The holidays are often touted as the most wonderful time of the year, but for a person in addiction recovery, this can also be a stressful and incredibly triggering time.
As friends and family gather to celebrate, an estimated 19.7 million people will try to cultivate holiday cheer while simultaneously battling a drug or alcohol addiction. Of course, this is easier said than done, especially when everyone else is making merry however they please.
Whether you intend to spend time with friends and family or spend the holidays alone, you’ll likely face addiction triggers. How you respond to them will make the difference between continued sobriety and relapse. It’s in these moments that you must remain present and mindful, as arming yourself with these two principles will help you fight temptation and find relief elsewhere.
Here’s how to bring your focus back to the now so you can create a brighter future for yourself during the holiday season and beyond.
Feel your feelings
People who struggle with addiction often use their vices to escape the present moment and numb themselves. Drugs and alcohol provide temporary relief from uncomfortable or negative thoughts and feelings. Once people enter recovery, however, they can’t rely on these substances anymore, and the holidays once again become emotionally charged.
Instead of looking for an escape that involves drugs or alcohol, pause and feel your feelings in their entirety. Are you angry or grief-stricken? Ask yourself why.
Noticing these emotions, without judgment, will bring you back to the present moment. More importantly, it’ll give your body the chance to hold and then release stress and negative thought patterns, which will ultimately allow you to move on and be better. Eventually, those emotions will become opportunities for growth and understanding, not signs of an impending setback.
Control your environment
Of course, you shouldn’t intentionally place yourself in challenging situations to test your willpower. After all, you only have a finite amount of it, so it’s crucial that you’re mindful of your surroundings and spend time in positive, supportive environments this holiday season.
If being alone on Christmas Day is triggering, plan to hang out with friends or at least chat with someone you love. Maybe your relatives are the ones that trigger you. In this case, you must prioritize your recovery and attend alternative holiday celebrations. Regardless of who or what you choose to be around during this time, remember that you can always show up late, leave early, turn down invites and host your own celebrations.
Remember your ‘why’
One of the best ways to keep yourself accountable and avoid triggers is to remember why you got sober in the first place. Who or what motivates you to stay clean? Maybe it’s your children or wanting to succeed in your career. Deep down, it’s often the desire to build a better life for yourself, and ultimately, contribute some good to the world.
Make a list of all the primary reasons you stay sober on a small notecard, and keep the list in your wallet, pocket or purse. Remember to pull it out and read it whenever you feel you might give in to temptation and need some extra encouragement. When you remember your ‘why,’ you’ll be more apt to honour it—and yourself.
Practice deep breathing
Sometimes, the best way to practice being present is to breathe. Being mindful of your breath sounds simple, but it can prove to be difficult when you’re trying to avoid triggers. Often, you’ll notice that you hold your breath or adopt rapid breathing patterns when faced with challenging situations. In those moments, it’s vital that you tune in with your body and focus on the breath.
Take one breath in through the nose. Hold it. Then, exhale through the mouth. Repeat this cycle for one minute and slowly work up to a few minutes of deep breathing per day. Maintain a slow and steady inhalation-to-exhalation ratio to calm your parasympathetic nervous system and decrease anxiety, racing thoughts and shallow breathing. Return to your breath whenever you need to be exactly where you are, as you are.
Move your body
You know exercise is good for you, but did you know it can help you avoid addiction triggers, too? Aside from filling your time and distracting your mind, moving your body can also boost your brain’s endorphin supply.
These feel-good neurotransmitters play an important role in the brain’s reward system by essentially giving you a healthy “high” from working out. Some of those in addiction recovery find that chasing this kind of high fills the void and gives them a purpose that substances never could.
Adopting a regular movement routine will also help you appreciate everything your body can do when it’s sober and fully functional. Whether it’s achieving a new personal record on the leg press or nailing pigeon pose during a Yoga session, doing hard things will prove that you’re totally capable of transformation. You simply need to commit and follow through.
Start journaling
The more you know about your recovery process and triggers, the more power you’ll have over them. This reminder should empower you to keep learning about yourself and how you respond to different sensations and situations. The most accessible method of self-study is journaling.
Set aside a few minutes each day to write or type whatever comes to mind. Let your thoughts flow onto the page. Can you identify any recent triggers? Why do you feel the way you feel?
Simply documenting your life during the recovery process can provide enough insight to pinpoint negative thinking and behaviour patterns. Once you determine your stressors or potentially harmful habits, you can take actionable steps to avoid and overcome them.
To thine own self be true
It’s a common saying in the world of recovery: To thine own self be true. Essentially, you’re your number one accountability partner. You have to live with the decisions you make and, at some point, you have to be true to yourself and make the right choice.
Now that you’re in recovery, it’s more important than ever to be true to yourself. Do what works for you and leave all other advice by the wayside. Then, you can develop a lifestyle that prioritizes presence, mindfulness and ultimately, healing.
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