Compassionate Commitment: Growing Together Through Awareness, Empathy and Kindness

ISBN: 978-1773802152
Paperback, 112 pages
April 2019

Take Your Relationship From Ignorance and Conflict to Awareness and Fulfillment

In Buddhist psychology, it is said that the root of all pain is ignorance.

Nowhere in life is our ignorance more evident and frustrating than when we attempt to relate with someone we love and find ourselves forever walking through relational minefields. 

We find ourselves consistently being frustrated in our efforts to relate with our partner and become upset with the way they are relating to us.

This book is intended to describe what a real relationship of compassionate commitment is between two people and explores:

  • How to negotiate the inevitable season of struggle between partners
  • Providing insight into how couples will use the same words and speak different languages
  • The importance of not taking things personally
  • Understanding the role that stress plays in our relationship
  • Learn compassionate communication

What Couples Can Gain From This Book

The purpose of this book is to help couples gain a sense of what is going on between themselves and to help develop the awareness and skills to get beyond their confusion, frustration, pain and suffering, to a sense of fulfillment as individuals and as relational partners.

Information contained in this book is the distillation of over forty-seven years work as a marriage and family therapist. The author has utilized the exercises in this book in his private practice and while running couples communication, anger management, anxiety, depression, mind-body awareness and other courses where he integrated mindfulness as a behavioural health instructor with Kaiser Permanente.

Ten percent of book sales go towards enabling youth in developing countries to access better educational opportunities. This money is being donated to Build to Learn, an initiative started by The Mindful Word.


Incredibly helpful application of secular Buddhist psychology to relationships

This is a well-written, straight-forward, thoughtful explanation of how to use Buddhist psychology to better understand, repair and strengthen relationships with our significant others, even in the most difficult times. It covers the real issues that can confront relationships: attraction, communication, stressful times, anger, intimacy, parenting, illness, aging, death, and more. Best of all, this book is filled with practical step-by-step ways to apply the insights to your relationship. Highly recommend this book to counselors, therapists and lay persons.

– Anne Dana

A small book carrying the potential of great importance

Jim’s book is a sweet reminder to all of us, whether in or out of relationship, that being with someone does not have to be difficult, and that being together can elevate the tiniest thing to a higher space and experience. It just takes a mutual interest in learning how the other dances and the shared commitment to figure out the steps along the way and as they change. Some dances lead to more. Others are short and sweet and perfect that way. Many leave scars and unnecessary feelings of inadequacies.

– Bente Mirow (

About the author

James Farwell is a clinical fellow in the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy. In addition to his private practice, he has served as a behavioural health instructor with Kaiser Permanente where he integrated mindfulness practices in couples communication, anger management, depression, anxiety and mind-body awareness courses.