It’s time to count down to the new year! Are you thrilled about your potential in 2022? Are you already thinking about your New Year’s resolution?
Setting a goal is a good way to start a year. But you won’t be able to achieve it until you let go of any inner obstacles you have not explored. A growth-inhibiting mindset, suppressed emotions and unfulfilled needs are possible obstacles that may be in your way.
Now is a good time to examine what is holding you back from the life you want and release it with the passing year.
Possible inner obstacles
A growth-inhibiting mindset
A mindset is a collection of deep-rooted perceptions, beliefs and thoughts. Your mindset forms your attitude and significantly influences your feelings and behaviour. Having a positive mindset is a must for your growth. For example, it would be hard to achieve the goal of earning more income if you didn’t believe, deep in your mind, that you deserve financial abundance.
If you have had a challenge in an area of your life for a long time, descend into your inner world and examine your long-held beliefs and thoughts. Any negative mindset has to go before you set a new goal.
Suppressed emotions
If you want to thrive and grow, you need to experience your emotions fully and express them in appropriate ways. It is easy doing so for happy feelings, including joy, excitement, calmness and confidence. But how about challenging ones such as anger, sadness, resentment and fear?
When it comes to emotional experience, we are like kids who want to eat only dessert and leave our vegetables on the plate. We want to feel only positive emotions and avoid negative ones. However, any ignored or suppressed emotion will accumulate inside you and create a blockage in your energy flow. Acknowledging and honouring the entire palette of emotions will clear the pathway to life satisfaction.
Unfulfilled needs
If you have a challenging issue in your life, think about your underlying need for it. For instance, the real reason for not losing weight may be the need for more love, friendship or fulfillment in life. Unless such a need is met, lower calorie intake and workouts may be effective, but only temporarily. The weight issue will eventually return.
There is always a strong (often lifelong) need that makes you behave in a certain way, affecting your decision-making and forming your lifestyle. Chances are, you are not aware of it.
Feeling lonely not having a partner or close friend? You may have a hidden need for staying away from intimacy, so you are free from any interpersonal conflicts. Working too much without enough free time? Ask yourself if you have an unconscious need for the accomplishment, recognition and fulfillment that hard work brings to you.
Identify and release your obstacles
Identify your obstacle(s)
Let’s find out if you have any hidden obstacles that keep you from achieving what you want in life.
First, find a private space where you can sit quietly without any distractions. Have a notebook or journal and a pen beside you. Sit with good posture to create a good energy flow and close your eyes. Pay attention to your breath. You will notice that your breath slows down once it receives your attention. When your breath becomes steady and deep, think about your current challenge. Then ask yourself if there is any negative mindset, repressed emotion or underlying need surrounding your issue.
Stay in silence until you hear your inner feedback. Listen to it with full attention. Once your exploration is complete, open your eyes and write down your discovery. You may not receive an answer to your question in one session. Do this practice every day until you have your “Aha!” moment.
Release your obstacle(s)
Once you identify your hidden obstacle, determine to let it go with the passing year. Don’t allow yourself to carry it over into the new year. Your sense of urgency will help you release the mindset, emotion or need that prevents you from growing and shining. After making a firm commitment to let go of your obstacle, try one or more of the following strategies that speak to your heart.
Four methods of release
Ritual
Hold a private ceremony to mark the closure of your inner experience. My end-of-year ritual is to make a bonfire and symbolically burn what I want to let go of. I write down what I have decided to release on pieces of paper and throw them into the fire. Watching the paper first turning into flames, and then ash gives me a profound sense of closure.
I have also made a drawing that expressed my fear and symbolically released it into the stream (I used flower petals to represent my drawing). I know a person who burned a dozen journals to let go of his painful memories.
Whatever you do, make your ritual appealing to your five senses. You could burn a candle, light incense, arrange flowers, use an essential oil diffuser, play soothing music or sip specialty tea. It will signal closure to your body, mind, heart and spirit.
Journaling
Write down the obstacle you have identified and why you need to release it now. You will be surprised to see what is coming out. It is like pulling a vine from the ground. As the leaves appear, one after another, thoughts will keep arising. Jot down the words (verbs, nouns and adjectives) and short phrases that come to your mind in the order of their appearance, instead of writing complete sentences. No worries about misspelling or grammatical errors—no one will read your writing!
Bypass your laptop and use a pen and a journal or notebook for this practice. Your sloppy handwriting has the power to help you express your emotions and go deeper into your psyche. Once you put down on the page all that your heart and mind have to say, write, “I am letting go of (your obstacle) with full power and determination.” Then write, “It’s over/done/gone (use your own word to mark a closure of your inner experience)” in powerful handwriting.
Expressive art
Express your current obstacle through art—no need to create an awesome art piece! It will be a representation of your inner work, not an artistic endeavour. Choose the art form you feel most comfortable with (drawing, collage, calligraphy, abstract painting and so on) Use materials you have at home, such as a black pen, markers, crayons, coloured pencils and wrapping paper.
To start, choose a quiet time and space in order to reflect on your obstacle. When you are ready, express your obstacle freely, using the materials you’ve gathered. Don’t worry about making messy artwork, and just go with the flow. Once you finish, release it in a way that feels good to you. You could:
- Hold a ceremony (as described in the first step above)
- Draw a big X over your artwork (a good choice if it’s a drawing, painting or collage)
- Throw it into a trash bin with a shout: “That’s it, GONE!”
Witness
Ask a trusted friend or family member to witness your process of releasing your obstacle. Request this person to just listen to you with full attention, as you talk about your obstacle and your determination to let it go now. The witness should not give you feedback, comment on what you have said or offer any advice or suggestions.
At the end of your monologue, say, “I am now releasing (your obstacle),” with assurance and energy. Then, have your witness say, “I have just witnessed you release (your obstacle).” End this practice with a heartfelt hug with your witness.
Get ready for a fresh start
The end of the year is the best time to let go of your inner obstacles. Release what is blocking your growth now and get ready for a fresh start to the new year!
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image 1 Ulrike Mai from Pixabay 2 Students band birds by Penn State via Flickr 2.0 Generic (CC BY-NC 2.0) 3 image by Pexels from Pixabay
