Success can be defined as a measurement of your capability to foster what you value in your life on a daily basis.
Until recently, I’ve been healing how I perceive success and wealth. Contrary to popular belief, I don’t see success as a corporate status, a number in your bank account, or traditional milestone achievements (such as buying a house, settling down and marrying).
When I went on a solo birthday vacation trip this year, I paid for a luxury spa treatment, a mud sea salt body scrub and a beautiful glamping getaway in a tiny cabin in Northern Ontario, next to a gorgeous sunset on a lake. I had everything I needed, including all the books I loved, my creative notebook and a few other items that are precious to me. I spent a lot of time alone in the woods.
My fortune to afford such experiences is socially seen as an illusory symbol of success, gained by the acquisition of material comforts and luxuries. In other words, being able to accommodate entertainment, self-care and leisurely activities is often far from affordable in our time, and these things are viewed as provisions that only the moderately wealthy can afford.
Growing up in poverty and now experiencing this financial stability made me dumbstruck as to how empty I felt in the presence of these possessions.
I watched my growing income buy me these assets and experiences that are seen as symbols of wealth and success, and yet, I felt alone. I shouldn’t feel like this, I thought. And then I had another thought: I’m certainly grateful for the victory and success of having come this far. But—there’s always a but—isn’t there?
It’s not gratitude that I’m lacking, I realized, but perhaps I’m entertaining an improper definition of success and its relationship to monetary wealth. Being on this trip made me re-evaluate the purpose of wealth as a tool for one’s success. As mentioned previously, success (by my definition) is measured by how much you nurture what you value in your life on an everyday basis.
Taking a closer look at values
Value is measured by how much something provides benefit to you, regardless of whether the benefits are psychological, emotional, spiritual or physical. The things you value are often accompanied by feelings of joy, vitality, enthusiasm and optimism.
The things I value most are extremely different from the material things that are commonly valued as representations of success.
For example, I don’t find much personal value in spas, fancy picturesque vacations, boats, cars, big mansions and such. For me, setting strong boundaries of respect for myself and others, learning to embrace my feminine energy, and appreciating and creating beauty are a few self-growth processes I value dearly. If success is a measure of how much I can physically nurture the things I value daily, it would then make sense for me to establish boundaries, feminine energy and beauty every day of my life.
Keeping my boundaries rooted
To practice keeping my boundaries rooted, I repeat daily affirmations, prayer and conversations with a higher power. I also ascertain my responsibility to walk with conscious integrity and justice by doing the right thing for me and making decisions with respect for myself and others. I do as I speak so that when I speak, others will listen to, trust and respect my wisdom.
Fostering my feminine energy
To foster my feminine energy, I practice surrendering to the flow and cycles of life, navigating them with grace and maintaining a loving mindset amid creative confusion, chaotic events and destructive people. I’m intuitively learning when my body and mind need to rest and when to start focusing on building and working. I’m learning how to release outcomes and attachments by reminding myself that I did the right thing and stuck to my boundaries in particular situations.
Cultivating beauty
Every day, I try and stay positive by practicing presence and getting more in touch with all my senses so I can open a portal of creativity and effective manifestation. In this open-heart space, I cultivate beauty by romanticizing my life and myself. For example, I buy flowers and incense for myself almost every week. I often buy beautiful new embroidery or a dress with gorgeous artwork and fine detail.
I’m constantly thinking of new stories to write or new decor to add to the brown and dark blue-green colour palette in my apartment, which has a Boho-inspired and earthy theme. I think of which historical and culturally diverse emblems I want to buy and place in ‘just the right spot’ in the house, because each spot has meaning and intention for me. The comfort and warmth of my little apartment oozes a sensual, sophisticated ambience that is just simply breathtaking to me.
I also practice writing daily, inspiring others towards healing consciousness through my writing and everyday conversations. With these practices, I can open a safe and healing space for others.
Wealth can support pure abundance
So, how does wealth come into play with my success?
A good friend once told me, “Money doesn’t buy you freedom. It just gives you options.” I know what he meant, but I didn’t understand it until now. I realize that our cultural perception of material attainment is a representation of success. However, once you understand what your values are, you can integrate them into your daily life, and thus cultivate success. Money is simply a resource that can be used in a variety of ways to help you foster more of what you value in your life.
Money is simply a resource that can be used in a variety of ways to help you foster more of what you value in your life.
The best way to know where to invest your monetary wealth and cultivate success in your life is to nurture your values daily. By doing this, you’ll live in a state of authenticity and power, and from this position, your money will become easier to allocate. It can be used to help you grow in an authentic and fulfilling manner that feels successful and joyful for you.
I realize that having more money doesn’t mean you should invest it into what is culturally defined as ‘popular,’ ‘successful,’ or ‘valuable,’ but into the things you value that give your life-force energy. For me, spreading messages of healing consciousness is something I feel called to teach and learn more about, and it’s also one of my values.
When I come into greater material wealth, I’ll buy more equipment and technology (cameras, lights, books, magazines, video editing software, article subscriptions, courses and the like) to help me spread these messages through creative pursuits such as writing, photography and video content creation. In general, I’ll spread more beauty and love in my life, give back to my local community and buy land to build a sustainable home with a crop and flower garden.
In short, if you know your values, begin by practicing them daily in small and manageable action steps. Once you start living by your values, you’ll automatically become successful because you’ll be living in complete authenticity, affecting self-empowerment. You can then allocate more monetary provisions towards these values, and this will grow true wealth (in the general sense of the term) because you’ll be growing what’s truly valuable to you anyway.
In this context, the wealth that grows from the success of living by your values won’t just be financial. Instead, it’ll be pure abundance in all its forms.
Ask yourself what you value
The next time you wish you were wealthier or more successful, I want you to ask yourself first what you value. I felt much more successful and happy while I was typing away at my keyboard with a cheap instant coffee, thinking of new content to write in the comfort of my own home, than I did when I was lying face-down and having someone rub my back for a few minutes with oil.
I’d like you to liberate yourself from the confines of social convention and the limitations of general definition, and re-examine your relationship to success. What does success look like to you? Where did you learn what it is and what it visually looks like? What values do you personally uphold or wish to develop in your everyday life that would help you feel more successful? After you ask yourself these questions, examine the ways in which your monetary wealth might be able to help you spread more of your values in the world.
Redefining what success means to you will reshape where you invest your money and how meaningfully you grow your wealth—financial and otherwise.
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image 1: nattanan23; image 2: StockSnap
