Peace. We wish it for ourselves and for the world at large. But we human beings do many things—often unconsciously—that destroy our own sense of inner peace. We worry about events that never come to pass. We get caught up in incidents that we’re powerless to change. And we try to anticipate outcomes for situations that will undoubtedly unfold in their own way, in their own time.
Stoics strive to create inner peace by tempering their reactions to an unpredictable world.
A Stoic knows they can’t control whether there’s conflict between countries, but they can control how they respond to such things. While empathy is certainly a device in the Stoic’s toolkit, so is knowing what one can and can’t change and using one’s energy accordingly. And nowhere does this apply more than to a Stoic’s own sense of inner peace.
There are more things … likely to frighten us than there are to crush us. We suffer more often in imagination than in reality.
Seneca
Why pursue inner peace?
At one time or another, we’ve all analyzed our behaviour after a situation is over and decided we overreacted. Maybe it was an argument or a minor accident. Whatever it was, after we got away from the emotions of the moment, we felt less angry or upset. Essentially, when we looked at the situation from a calmer perspective, we saw it for what it was in the context of our whole life: no big deal.
That second response is a manifestation of equanimity, or displaying an even temper no matter how difficult the situation we find ourselves in. This state of mind is a Stoic’s goal every day, and they aim to get it right the first time. The decision to approach everything with mental calmness brings inner peace to each moment.
But don’t confuse this with being emotionless. Stoics feel emotions like everyone else, but they don’t let themselves get carried away. Enjoy a favourite chocolate dessert, a promotion at work or an embrace from a friend, but understand that tomorrow, everything might be different. So don’t put too much faith or currency on what happens today. Avoid having expectations. Delight in the moment but recognize that every moment must pass. Everything is temporary, including us.
Some people grasp onto an illusion of control by imagining every possible outcome of a trying situation they’re going through. This is the antithesis of inner peace, as putting oneself through even an imaginary fallout can be stressful. What’s worse, humans are terrible at predictions. What will happen will probably be something they haven’t considered, so why waste precious time?
Stoics don’t indulge in this type of mental exercise. They take a wait-and-see approach, living life in the moment and accepting the way it unfolds.
A virtuous life is a peaceful life
Stoics believe a good life comes from adhering to four virtues: temperance, wisdom, justice and courage. This path also brings them peace, as it provides a framework for the unpredictability of the world.
Imagine riding a raft in fast-moving rapids. The flimsy craft bobs and splashes, hitting rocks and plunging into waves. The Stoic wears a life vest, but they also know there’s no sense in trying to row or control the raft in any way. The rapids will decide what happens. Despite the chaos of getting hit with icy water and bouncing around in the rough river, this acceptance brings them a sense of calm.
People try to get away from it all—to the country, to the beach, to the mountains. You always wish that you could too. Which is idiotic: you can get away from it anytime you like. By going within. Nowhere you can go is more peaceful—more free of interruptions—than your own soul.
Marcus Aurelius
Mastering the art of self-control is the key to a Stoic’s sense of inner peace. This includes controlling impulses, which starts with self-awareness. Like any habit, this takes practice and repetition before it becomes automatic. The reward is settling the see-saw of highs and lows of a life that’s ruled by external factors. The raft makes it through the rapids and floats on smooth waters.
Inner peace is a choice
Stoics also understand that humans put a value judgement of “good” or “bad” on life’s occurrences. Without those judgments, everything is neutral. It simply “is.”
Here’s an example: Selling your house for a record price in your neighbourhood is good for you, because you get to keep the profit. But your neighbours are worried about their houses being reassessed and having to pay higher property taxes, so to them it’s not a happy occasion. The exact same case has implications that can be good or bad, depending on the point of view.
To an indifferent world, this house sale—this transaction that has you and your neighbours either celebrating or wringing their hands with concern—is meaningless.
To a Stoic, inner peace comes from acting on only what’s within their control. That comes down to one thing: their own response to whatever happens.
Stoicism for inner peace
When it comes to stoicism for inner peace, gaining control over one’s own emotions, reactions and responses is a lot like Pinocchio’s transformation from a puppet into a real boy. You shed the strings that someone else can pull on with their behaviour, tugging until they elicit a response from you.
When you’re in control, you decide how much of yourself you want to give to a situation. For a Stoic, it’s a measured, even response every time. Mindfulness and temperance are inherent in the practice of Stoicism, bringing with them the inner peace that we all crave.
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