Then I went to the locally infamous Psynetics Psychic Fair. It felt like a carnival. I went from one tent or stand to another, experiencing a palm reading, an astrological reading, an aura reading, a numerology reading, a session with a medium and so on. Nothing hit home for me. In retrospect, though I was always polite, I came to understand how ungenerous I’d been in my conclusions.
I turned and saw a middle-aged lady looking at me with a beautiful and gentle smile. More than that, it was a smile of knowing, as if she knew me.
As I continued to shuffle through the fair, I heard a woman’s voice ask, “Would you like a reading?” I turned and saw a middle-aged lady looking at me with a beautiful and gentle smile. More than that, it was a smile of knowing, as if she knew me. Her eyes sparkled.
I remember looking behind me to see if she was looking at someone else.
She laughed and asked me to sit down across from her. She cupped one of my hands in both of hers. Without fanfare, she proceeded to tell me about me. Nonstop. No questions.
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. She told me things that were impossible for her to know. She told me about my inner self—my hopes and fears, and how I saw myself. She talked to me about my talents, my good and bad habits, my loves lost and my home life. Halfway through, tears were streaming down my face. Forty minutes later, she finished.
Her name was Beverly McLaughlin. Dear, dear Beverly.
I was stunned, shaken to the core. The skeptic part of me, Mr. Doubting Thomas, was in his death throes. Not unlike the Wicked Witch of the West, I was melting. More than anything, I was smiling from wonder.
In the weeks that followed, however, I came to realize that I could no longer merely be the observer, because I’d again be required to have faith in what others proffered as truth. I must be willing to be the observed. For it was I who must become the medium if, in truth, mediumship was a legitimate phenomenon. How else would I know if there was life after death?
Over the course of a year, I became a vegetarian, went on a three-day water fast and meditated, ad nauseam. I prayed to God, asking Spirit to touch me, to communicate with me.
The result? Deafening silence.
Regardless, I signed up for yet another meditation class. This time it was with a fantastic medium whom I’d met months earlier. As I did with Psynetics, I volunteered to help with his organization. Contrary to every other medium I’d experienced up to that point, he was outstanding. Like Beverly, he left me breathless.
His name was William Rainen. Dear, dear William.
The purpose of the class was personal well-being, but we prayed for contact from spirit as well. On several occasions, a few people reported that spirit might have—in one fashion or another—communicated with them. I wanted to believe them.
For me? The usual. Nothing happened. Yes, I’d achieve an inner peace of sorts, but contact with spirit? No.
I was losing hope.
Week 12, the final class! I entered into my meditation. Nothing.
That’s it. Enough already, I’m done.
While still in the middle of my meditation, I decided to end my search once and for all. Finis! Yet, I was at peace. Completely so. No rancour or resentment, just complete and utter surrender.
And that’s when it happened.
While still in meditation, I experienced a huge contraction in my solar plexus, my upper stomach. It felt as if a bellows from my belly was forcing an intense column of air up my windpipe and through my voice box.
And I wasn’t doing it!
I was fully aware of a force of energy ‘semi-breathing’ for me, while struggling to form words. He managed some vocalized sounds: not dissimilar to a young child learning to talk, I suppose. I was conscious and fully aware. My body was hot, my brain on fire and I felt warm tears running down my face. The force left after five minutes or so.
And my life changed forever.
There is no failure; there is only growth.Spirit speaking through direct voice medium, Thomas Jacobson
What followed were private daily sittings with several people from the class to see what, if anything, would happen. It did happen. Again and again. Then it didn’t.
For two weeks, I’d go into meditation and nothing would happen. I thought it was all over. In truth, I felt abandoned. Worse, I pondered, had I manufactured the whole thing with my unconscious mind?
In week three, it happened again. Spirit informed me that they hadn’t come through during my meditations because they wanted me to be clear that it was them, not me. Several different spirits came through, including a female named Miriam. In the coming weeks, the quality of their voicing improved, as my ability to surrender to their presence progressed.
Word got around, and increasing numbers of people wanted to experience my mediumship. My “little odyssey … undeclared, undisclosed and unvoiced” of 1977 evolved into a fantastic 15-year career (1980 to 1995).
I wasn’t looking for a career; it just turned out that way, in that I was driven to share the reality of life after death and the genuine purpose of our lives with as many people as possible.
I wasn’t looking for a career; it just turned out that way, in that I was driven to share the reality of life after death and the genuine purpose of our lives with as many people as possible. I was excited. I wanted to help people. For years, I offered weekly freewill-donation demonstrations in Los Angeles. I went into a trance while live on various radio shows, and a book was written about my work.
I had many successes, but failures, too.
Think of a 1930s radio set with occasional static and the signal fading in and out. It’s the same for mediums. For that matter, it’s true for all of us, as human beings, in our innate and subliminal communion with the Other Side. Though mediumship—or, at least my mediumship, specifically—is flawed and well beyond the ability of the medium to control (necessarily so), I was determined to go public so that I could share the good news. There were several heartbreaking failures when, for a moment, I much regretted that decision.
Please don’t misunderstand, it was a joyous experience beyond words. Every time I came out of my trance, I felt enlightened—for about 10 seconds. While in my trance state, I experienced the depth of Spirit’s compassion and their unwavering devotion to the well-being of whomever they were addressing. They were an intensely electric, vibrant and shimmering presence both within and closely around my body. You might say I was the cello and they were the cellist. I learned that there is, for us all, great purpose in the living of our lives.
I discovered that there is indeed life after death, I’d found the Afterlife. Moreover, in the doing, I found love beyond my wildest dreams and imaginations: love that surrounds each of us, though often ‘behind the scenes’ of our physical senses.
You cannot fail, and all of the challenges of Earth
are nothing but schoolbooks in a big school called Planet Earth,
where you are guaranteed graduation … eventually.Spirit speaking through direct voice medium, Thomas Jacobson