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RISK VS FUN: Growth inevitably involves testing our limits

Last updated: January 27th, 2019

1.

In the yard at the preschool where I work, I recently saw something I could scarcely believe. It involved two little girls and the “beginner stilts” that you’ve probably seen:  pairs of red, plastic cups with a loop of rope tied into each side, so that a child can balance and walk on the cups, pulling the rope loop tight and holding the other end in his/her hands.

Each of these two girls was holding one of the stilts. Very quickly, as I watched, each girl looped hers around her friend’s neck and then her own and, giggling, they began to dance in a circle. They hadn’t the slightest idea how easy it would be to strangle one another!

In a little while, they fell down, fortunately safe. The activity was so alarming that another teacher, who had seen this from a classroom, raced outside, apparently under the impression that I thought such a dangerous activity could be “supervised.” I did not, and immediately took the toy stilts from the girls with an admonition, “We can never do this! It’s very, very dangerous!”

2.

At what age does good judgement dawn? (To a degree, of course, most of us are still learning.) Although a teacher gets a sense, after knowing a class for a while, which children have the best judgement, state law in California mandates that all children be in a teacher’s sight at all times.

Our director once shared an anecdote from a mom who’d discovered her child playing in the street. “You need to come up in the yard,” the mother said. “You could get run over.”

“I don’t mind getting run over!” the child had protested.

3.

And yet, we can’t overprotect our children. They need, as we all do, “safe risks”—otherwise known as challenges—in order to grow. The devising of such growth risks is the responsibility of creative teachers and designers.

By far the most creative growth environment for children, and everyone else too, that I’ve ever experienced, is the City Museum in my home town, St. Louis, Missouri. This museum, designed by sculptor Bob Cassilly, contains a seemingly unending array of wonders and challenges.

It was my good fortune to observe a remarkable scene during a visit there several years ago. I came upon a small room that consisted entirely of a huge, steep-sliding wall—20-feet long or more—leading down to a big sandpit. In front of this pit was only the narrow passerby-walkway that I was on.

As I entered the room, I saw three girls, who may all have been sisters, sitting on a ledge at the top of the sliding wall. Two of the girls were quite a bit older than the third—seven or eight to her four. These two, holding hands, commiserated a moment about the dizzy slide that lay ahead of them. Then, without compunction, they counted to three and went down giggling! It was a big thrill, but for them not a really big deal.

The 4-year-old, on the other hand, was still at the top. For her, it was a big deal. She continued to calculate risk versus fun. After all, the slide was nearly twice the distance for her, in proportion to her body size.

Watching as she went through this process—she clearly did have judgement (the slide had been tested exhaustively for safety, but she didn’t know that)—I felt profound respect for her. She finally decided it was safe enough, let go,and went screaming down!

When that little girl landed in the sandpit below, I saw her face form into what may be the deepest expression of pleasure that I’ve ever witnessed in my life. I was actually seeing human growth.

Ever since that day, I’ve felt huge esteem for those, like Bob Cassilly, who have the imaginative knack to create appropriate challenges for children. For growth necessarily involves testing limits. With our help, and the help of the experts and designers we enlist, it can be the adventure it should be—and a safe, sane one.


image: AdrienneMay (Creative Commons BY-SA)

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